Road Trip From Hell.

So instead of having Thanksgiving last Thursday like the rest of the country, we went out to my grandma's apartment to clear out her things and bring them back to my folks house. We then took the stuff my folks set aside for us and loaded it up and brought it back out here. Now the trip took about 8 hours each way. Somewhere around hour six, we pulled off at a rest area (again!) and as we backed up, we heard a bang! Then the truck refused to go back any further. Somehow, SOMEHOW, FarmerGeek managed to force it backwards. We figured that as long as it would go forward, we could make the next 2 hours and we could find a mechanic. Yeah, about that. Not ten minutes down the Thruway we hear BANG, whoop whoop whoop, BANG, whoop whoop whoop, BANG... well you get the idea... Now we have to pull off at exit 46. Which really sucked because we have friends at exit 45 and 44. SO we stop at Pep Boys (God bless whoever invented the Garmin!) and FarmerGeek takes the tire off and looks around at it. It seems one of the bolts that goes into the caliper and holds it to the mount is just gone- vanished! (For those of you who, like me, have no clue about such things- that has to do with the brakes.) Since we are at Pep Boys already, FarmerGeek goes in to buy the elusive bolt. They, surprise surprise, don't have it! They do instruct us to go to this other place, so we do. Inevitably, the parking lot is tiny, and every space is one that you have to back out of. But, we figure we don't have to worry about it, we'll replace the part and no problem. (Meanwhile I notice that the gas station next door has a camera crew at it, the news was broadcasting because of how low the gas price was. Of course, it was still forty cents more than at home.) Anyways, the second place doesn't have it and now we had to back up out of the spot. This is when I heard the words every wife wants to hear from her husband, "You're going to have to get behind the wheel and back up, I'm going to have to stick my hand in there and move it while you're backing up."

We both survived limbs intact.

Finally we go to a dealer, a nice fancy car dealer, and park in the parking lot next to their nice fancy new shiny cars. By this time it is, naturally, snowing to beat the band and we, of course, have to walk around the building to get to the parts department. We go in, and the guy behind the counter quickly pulls up a diagram on the computer of our particular wheel/brake/ front of truck and points to this stupid bolt and says, "I think this is what you need, I have it but it's not going to make your day." And I start thinking, oh crap it's going to cost us a small fortune and we're probably going to have to buy a whole new caliper. Then he says, "Normally it retails for $9.99 (I heard $999) but I'll give you a break and charge you $6.75 (I hear $675)." I nearly start to cry. FarmerGeek pulls a ten out to pay for it and it finally dawns on me that it's only going to cost six DOLLARS and seventy-five CENTS. We take our new bolt out to the truck and FarmerGeek proceeds to replace it in the parking lot with me standing guard over him so he doesn't get hit. Now somewhere in this process FarmerGeek has managed to rip his pants in a spot no man wants a draft (Love you honey!!! :D Sorry...)

But the story doesn't end here... oh no...

We make it all the way to the hotel and met up with my parents. The next morning we get up (this is, of course, Thanksgiving for the rest of the country) and the tire is flat. Yes the tire that lost the bolt the day before. So FarmerGeek changes the tire in the middle of the hotel parking lot. And manages to keep his pants intact (I really do love you sweetie!!!). We drive to the apartment, load up the moving truck and both vehicles, and are ready to go. We decide to start out for my folks house and figure to get there about eleven that night (it's a four hourish drive). For the record, my folks live about two minutes from the exit, I pull up to the toll both and I hear BANG, whoop whoop whoop, Bang, whoop whoo- well you get the picture. We get to my folks house and FarmerGeek tries out the truck (he was driving the moving van) and decides the tires need balanced and aligned and since we were planning on buying new tires anyways and Sears had a radio commercial about their Black Friday sale... We decided to take a hotel room right near the mall so that at 5 AM on Black Friday we could get... tires? Man are we boring. Thus how I ended up getting tires for my 30th birthday.

Anyways, we get to Sears, they say about two hours so we walk over to the mall. It was dead until about nine. (No one goes to Eastern Hills anyways.) So we walk back and they tell us the problem is that the OTHER FREAKING BOLT HAS DISAPPEARED!!!! And they called the dealership and they don't have it- no one in the area has it. FarmerGeek does not take no for an answer and calls the dealership to explain how we are stranded. Surprise, Surprise, they have the bolt only there it's $15 instead of $9.99.

Finally we get everything settled, checked out of the hotel, everything paid for, new tires and bolt on and get to my parents house to unload and reload the moving van. Then we come out and that front tire is flat again! BRAND SPANKING NEW TIRE IS FLAT!!! So we drive back to Sears and find out that somehow there's now a hole in the rim of the tire and we need to replace that or else the tire will keep getting flat. So we call around and the only rim in the area that is available immediately is $304. What? So we have three brand new tires and a spare on the truck.

Sorry, this was a long post to say: Our truck broke down a few times and cost us a lot of time and money to fix. I wish I had pics for you... I really do... but the camera was packed in the suitcase.

Coming Soon: My 30th Birthday and the Thanksgiving celebration!

Alas...

I'd planned on blogging about my weekend, my birthday, and Thanksgiving. However, this morning we lost one of our chickens. Dear Fingers (yes that was her name) was dead in the coop. We knew last night we were going to have to cull her, she was huddled down and didn't even move when Farmer Geek tried to pet her.

She had no feathers on her neck (no she wasn't a turken) and was all puffed up, but her vent didn't show any signs of egg binding. If there are any chicken experts out there with any theories, let us know please! I'm worried that we might lose the whole flock. (Or as we call them, herd of chickens.)

Part 2--- Disaster!!!

OH AUTUMN WHEREFORE ART THOU?


This was NOT supposed to happen. Next time, I'm using the fancy silicone, or the one that has the swirling thing in the bottom. Actually the Wise Woman would have used the springform pan. I, unfortunately, am not the Wise Woman and ergo did not prevent disaster.

But it tastes REALLY good!
(But not as good as Autumn's.)

Autumn's Warning (or I Can't Believe It's Been a Year Already)

The one thing everyone remembers about our wedding (besides the whole kilt thing) is the Cake. It was the ooeyiest, gooeyist, chocolatey, buttery, BEST CAKE EVER!!! If for any reason, you should be anywhere near western PA and find it neccessary or desirable to get a cake, by all means go to http://www.autumnscakes.com/ (and no she isn't paying me for this commercial, but seriously, not only does she make the BEST CAKE EVER!!! but she's just an amazing and nice person.)

This is what our cake looks like one year later. She warned us, she really did, she said it was never as good the second time around. She even offers to make a new cake, but we had to go move to Ohio. Of course, we did think about driving back to PA to get it, but then reality reared its ugly head. Since it is tradition, I pulled it out the original and defrosted it. I also have the champagne we drank, and I put that in to chill. I know I'm a sap. I can't help it. (Stop making little vomit noises- I can hear you!)

But since the cake looks so good, but isn't going to taste at all like Autumn's BEST CAKE EVER!!! (it really does deserve the caps and exclamation points each time), I decided to bake a new cake today for FarmerGeek. (Stop making those vomit noises- I mean it!!!!)

So today, for your pleasure, my own chocolate chocolate chip cake, which is no where near as good or as cool as the BEST CAKE EVER!!! but as good as I get. Which is why I don't make cakes for a living.

Step 1:

Put in the Mamma Mia Soundtrack. Do not question me, just do it. Man it's the first step and already you question me... this does not bode well...

Next I got out the old Betty Crocker cookbook. It always good to have a jumping off point to start a recipe. I used the Devil's Food recipe.

Step 2: Assemble the Cast of Characters

1/2 c Hot water

3 sq. chocolate- melted

1/2 c of shortening (softened)

2 c of sugar

3 eggs

2 1/8 cups of flour, sifted

1/4 tsp of soda

2 1/4 tsp of baking powder

1 tsp of salt

2 tbsp of cocoa powder

4 tbsp of cultured buttermilk (the dried stuff)

1 c of water

Half a package of chocolate chips

Step 3: Start Assembling

*Melt chocolate in microwave. DO NOT TASTE... I'm warning you... you WON'T like it.
*Whisk in the water. Make sure it's still hot and don't worry if it looks funny, it'll be OK.

*Cream together the shortening and sugar, only hold back 1/3c of sugar for later.

*Then add three eggs.

(Can I just say- look at those eggs... do you SEE how dark those yolks are? That's my girls!)

* Remember that chocolate mixture we did in the microwave? Time to mix that in.

(Do not get distracted by the fact that your college roommate sent you a message on Facebook... ok, but not for too long!)

* Sift the flour, soda, baking powder, salt, and powdered buttermilk together. Then slowly mix into the chocolate mixture. Once that's mixed in, then add that last cup of water. Mix throughly.

* Add 2 tsp of cocoa. Then taste the batter and decide if/how much extra sugar you should add.

* Stir in half bag of chocolate chips.

* Your batter should now look like this:

And your kitchen should look like this:

And your face might look like this:

* Now carefully, pour evenly into two cake pans. And bake at 350 for 30-35 minutes until toothpick comes out clean.

Now post on your blog while it's baking....

And wait for part 2....

On a cold late fall morning...

It's finally happened, I was finally able to capture the true moment, the exact second, when the whole world holds its breath for an instant just wondering if God would really allow the sun to crest this morning. Would He reach out with His hand, the Hand that created the world and life itself, would He really reach out and give the sun that extra nudge to crest the horizon?

Behold all... the buttcrack of dawn.

Mmm.... tastes like chicken....

So our poor chickens have turned cannibal. Or they are on the cusp of turning cannibal, but they have been pecking each other's feathers out. The poor black and white one's butt is completely bare. So here I am in my choring outfit: old and ill-fitting jeans, work shoes, FarmerGeek's sweatshirt (which I have permanently borrowed), FarmerGeek's old corduroy work jacket, my work gloves, and my brand new red, shiny, faux crocodile purse.

I was pretty.

Of course, I was just heading out to the local Wal-mart- excuse me SUPER Wal-Mart- and Tractor Supply. I bought some things to hopefully stop the cannibalism. There are things I never thought I would do in life, like paint a chicken's butt with pine tar and utter the words, "I can't find her vent, I need to make sure I don't cover her vent or her a$$h0l@!"

But I finally got to take an egg out of the coop! Although, now all I can smell is that god-awful pine tar and chicken poop.

For your viewing pleasure, the chicken from "The Great Outdoors" if you know what I mean.

Home on the Homestead

So we got our first chickens. I really wanted to name them Sophia, Violet, Rosalind, Juilet, and Ophelia. Of course we got ten of them so I would have to come up with other names. I'm thinking Stew, Soup, Ann Dumplings, Cacciatore, Caesar, Fingers, Noodle, Fried, Broiled, and Bob. (Cause of course we need a Bob.)